What’s The Right Age To Give Kids Their Own Phones? An Early Childhood Education Expert Weighs In

When should kids get their own digital devices? And what happens after? Rowena Mark Ramos, an expert in early childhood education, weighs in on how parents can navigate the complexities of introducing phones and tablets to kids’ daily lives.

Mobile phones, tablets and digital devices in general have always been a hot and debatable topic amongst parents. We’re all well aware of the risks of too much screen time in children, especially infants. So, you’re not alone in wanting to know when’s the right age or time to give your child ‘free reign’ over a digital device, namely mobile phones and tablets. We can’t help but ask ourselves, how do we keep our kids safe? What happens if they develop an over-reliance? How do we deal with peer pressure?

We spoke with Rowena Mark Ramos, Head of Curriculum at Babilou Family Singapore who’s an expert in early childhood education. As a mum of two herself, Rowena believes that screen time and devices don’t have to be a pain point for families–when incorporated with boundaries and by understanding intentions on both ends. Here, she shares with us the stats of digital device usage, as well as handy tips parents can adopt when it’s finally time to give their kids their own mobile phones or tablets.

The stats behind kids and screen time

At what age do kids get access to devices?

Although the Ministry of Health discourages any screen use for kids under 18 months old, research shows that children are often introduced to screens as early as 1 or 2 years old.

Rowena observes that for many, this may begin as a tool for distraction—such as using a TV or a device during mealtime to keep the child occupied. A good cue to evaluate whether young kids have too much exposure to devices is when toddlers start mimicking adults by pretending a toy is a phone, or when they crave screen time during inappropriate moments.

When do kids typically get their own devices?

In Singapore, the average age at which children get their first internet-connected device—whether a smartphone or tablet—is 8 years old, according to a survey conducted by the National University of Singapore (NUS) and Google. This aligns with the broader trend where children under 10 begin to have access to more personal technology.

Read more: Getting Your Child Their First Cell Phone: The Pros & Cons

How much time are children spending on devices?

In the United States, one in four preschoolers watches screens for more than an hour each day. In Singapore, children aged 2 and under average two hours of screen time daily. Meanwhile, children in France aged 0 to 3 spend up to three hours a day in front of a screen, and 3- to 6-year-olds spend an average of three and a half hours daily.

The average screen time for primary school children is about four to five hours a day. This figure doesn’t include time spent using devices for homework, online learning, or other academic activities. With devices becoming more integrated into the school environment, this number is likely to increase, making it important for parents to be proactive in managing their child’s screen usage.

Tips for managing kids’ device usage

What’s the right age to give our child a mobile phone or tablet?

There is no universally agreed-upon “right” age for giving a child their own device, but Rowena emphasises that the decision should hinge on the purpose of the device. Before giving a child a phone or tablet, it’s essential for parents to ask themselves: What is the device for? Is it for safety, connectivity, or emergency purposes? Or is it for entertainment and social purposes?

Once parents are clear on the device’s purpose, they can communicate this to their children. A suitable age to broach the topic is after 6 years old when children can understand better and hold a conversation with an adult. This is also the age when children will begin to have more interactions with digital devices in Primary school, so parents can then introduce clear boundaries and rules. By framing the device as a tool for connection or safety, children will better understand its intended use.

Read more: Why I Regret Giving My Daughter A Phone

How can parents manage peer pressure and over-reliance on devices?

For younger children, the challenges are often related to how devices are introduced. If a device is provided to keep a child occupied, they may begin to rely on it to soothe themselves. Rowena advises parents to reflect on their role in this dynamic—are parents relying too much on devices to manage behaviour? Or is your child over-reliant on screens because they have been conditioned to use them?

In older children and teenagers, peer pressure is a significant factor. As kids become more aware of their social environment, they may feel “left out” if they don’t have access to the same devices or apps as their peers. For Rowena, keeping an open dialogue with children about their device usage and explaining the rationale behind the family’s rules can help. Instead of immediately saying “no,” parents can initiate an open conversation to understand their child’s intentions and offer alternatives or a compromise.

How can parents engage in meaningful conversations with their preschoolers?

Engaging in meaningful conversations with your preschooler is essential for mutual understanding, especially on the topic of digital devices. It is also important to remember that every child’s ability to comprehend and express themselves varies. Adjust your language and tone to suit your child’s level of understanding, and approach discussions with patience and an open mind to ensure your child feels heard and valued.

When asking questions, be mindful that the questions are not close-ended which invites children to answer with just a “yes”, “no” or one-word answers. Instead, ask open-ended questions that encourage both parent and child to carry the conversations further. In a conversation, avoid dismissing any ideas or emotions, even if they seem small or trivial, and instead validate your child’s feelings by responding with curiosity, such as asking, “What made you think of that?” or “Can you tell me more?” This approach encourages them to share their thoughts freely and builds confidence.

How to monitor kids’ device usage and manage screen time? 

Establishing clear guidelines for device usage is essential for managing screen time! This can include setting rules such as no devices during mealtime or family outings. Apps can also help track and limit screen time, providing families with the ability to set downtime on devices, and ensuring kids aren’t spending excessive time online. Importantly, Rowena suggests that parents discuss these monitoring tools with their children and foster trust, ensuring they don’t feel their privacy is being invaded.

Another helpful approach is having regular conversations with your child about what they’re doing on their device. Instead of asking to take a look at their phone, ask them to share what games they’re playing, videos they’ve watched, or messages they’ve sent. This opens the door for natural, ongoing communication about digital habits.

Read more: 10 Essential Tips on Kids Internet Safety

How can I balance screen time with social interaction? 

Rowena stresses that digital devices should be used as a tool for interaction, not as a replacement for meaningful face-to-face relationships. She encourages parents to engage with their children while they use digital devices—whether it’s watching a movie together, discussing a documentary, or reading articles online. This can help make screen time more social and purposeful.

Teaching Kids Healthy Boundaries with Technology

Rowena believes that teaching kids about healthy boundaries with technology begins with role modelling from adults. Parents should create clear family rules about device usage and make sure all family members are aligned on the expectations. Exposing children to devices at an early age should be done intentionally, with clear educational or communicative purposes.

Ultimately, the goal is not to ban technology but to help children develop a healthy relationship with it. By balancing screen time with other activities and fostering open communication, families can ensure that children navigate the digital world in a balanced and mindful way.