“I cannot imagine moving back to Singapore now” SG Family Talks About Expat Life in Europe

“Parenting in Germany focuses on learning through play. Kids learn to be independent and make their own decisions–life skills difficult to teach in a classroom environment.”

Oh Chyi Haur and his wife Aida Oh live in Munich, Germany, with their 14-year-old daughter. Both Chyi Haur and his wife were originally Singaporeans, but Chyi Haur became a Swedish citizen 3-4 years ago, while their daughter Chloe is both Singaporean and Swedish. The family lived in Sweden, Japan, and Indonesia before moving to Munich, where Chyi Haur worked as a Business Navigation Manager at IKEA.

We chat to Chyi Haur about life in Europe and how it differs from Singapore. Chyi Haur shares how kids in Germany learn to be independent and make their own decisions, and there is more work-life balance. We hear how the family has adapted with Chloe learning first Swedish and then German within a few months of moving to each country, and how they stay in touch with their Singaporean roots and the community. Read on for why Chyi Haur can’t imagine moving back to Singapore and what the family miss most from their home country.

Read more Overseas Family Stories here.

When did you move to Germany and what were the reasons you decided to move?

We moved to Munich, Germany, in August 2024 because of my new job with IKEA Germany. We were living in Älmhult in Sweden before this. Älmhult is the birthplace of IKEA and one of the corporate HQ locations in Sweden, where I worked previously.

Your family has lived in a few foreign countries – any favourites?

Yes, we have lived in Sweden for 7 years before moving to Germany. Before Sweden, we were living in Japan for 2 years and prior to that, Indonesia for 13 years. I think each country has its charm. We love each of the countries we lived in – Japan for sushi and onsen, not forgetting the Japanese efficiency, Sweden for IKEA and meatballs, nature and work/life balance and Germany also for nature and historical architecture.

But if we had to select one country, it would be Sweden. We lived there for 7 years. This was also the formation years for Chloe in elementary school education. The nature there is amazing and my daughter also had the opportunity to pick up many life skills and activities (like figure skating, horse riding and piano). Chloe was able to compete in Figure Skating in
several regional domestic competitions during this time. We were also able to take our boat to explore the many small islands in the lake near our house.

As I work for IKEA Chloe had the opportunity to be featured in two IKEA Global video productions–the Global Launch of the BYGGLEK Collection in 2020 ,which was a collaboration between IKEA and LEGO where the video played in all IKEA stores globally–and the other was the promotional video of IKEA Museum in Älmhult. Yes, there is an IKEA Museum! We are extremely proud that a Singaporean child was involved in these two videos.

Favourite aspect about living in Germany?

Munich, where we are living now, is a big city compared to where we came from in Sweden. The convenience of living is here, e.g. malls, restaurants, etc. It’s a safe city with plenty of open spaces, and it’s family-friendly too. A big plus is that Munich is at the centre of Western Europe, so travelling to other parts of Europe is easy. In the short time we have been in Munich, we have made numerous road trips to Switzerland, Austria, Italy, Liechtenstein, Luxembourg and France.

At the same time, Munich is close to the Alps and nature and numerous lakes and can be easily reached within an hour. There is always something fun to do as a family!

And the worst part?

I think the frustrating part of living in Germany is the bureaucracy. Dealing with public authorities means that every “I” needs to be dotted and every “t” needs to be crossed. We have been ‘warned’ before moving, but to experience this first-hand is really frustrating.

I also feel that the language barrier can be challenging. Although English is widely spoken, Munich, being in Bavaria (one of the most conservative states in Germany), people are not as receptive to speaking in English, even if they see you struggling to speak in German. Thus, it is crucial to pick up the German language quickly in order to survive in this environment.

How do you think parenting (and schools) in Germany differs from Singapore? What do you appreciate most about it?

Parenting in Germany, similar to many Western European countries, focuses on learning through play. Academic pressure is much lesser than that in Singapore. Kids in Germany also learn to be independent and make their own decisions within limits, and take responsibility early. Such are life skills which children learn at a young age and are difficult to teach in a typical classroom environment.

There is much more work-life balance. Kids are not burdened with a tremendous amount of homework in Germany. Generous parental leave also allows parents to be able to spend more time with their children.

My wife and I really appreciate such an environment. We see that our daughter, Chloe, grows up happy. This is the most important factor for us.

What do you find is the hardest part of being a parent living in a foreign country?

I think the toughest part is the limited opportunity to be connected to the home country, especially our extended family in Singapore. Physical interactions with our Singapore extended family are generally limited to the summer vacation trips back to Singapore.

Another aspect which we are struggling with is that, as we are also not proficient in the German language, we are not able to support Chloe in some of her schoolwork. This can be frustrating. However, our fears are really unfounded, as we can see Chloe is able to manage new languages (both German and Swedish) on her own.

How do you and your partner juggle work and dividing up family roles?

My wife loves to cook. She is able to prepare many delicious local Singapore dishes like Hainanese Chicken Rice, Laksa, Nasi Lemak, Lodeh, Mee Rebus, Sushi, Tempura and many more! As such, she prepares the meals at home. I do the rest. We also agree that I will monitor Chloe’s schoolwork.

Is there something that you do to keep your child in touch with their Singaporean roots?

Chloe is able to keep in touch with her Singapore roots through the famous Singapore food which my wife cooks and frequent video calls to her grandparents in Singapore.

We also encourage Chloe to use Singapore as a reference or material in her school projects whenever possible.

On raising multilingual children …
It is super important that children are at least bilingual. We are happy that Chloe is able to communicate in English, German and Swedish. We are amazed at how fast she is able to pick up languages.

When we first moved to Sweden, Chloe did not speak any Swedish. From when the school year started in August till after the New Year, we saw Chloe´s Swedish competency improve tremendously.

Now, after moving to Germany, we also have a similar experience. Having no German knowledge when school started in September, after the New Year, Chloe is now able to communicate with her friends comfortably in German.

My wife is Malay and I am Chinese. As we predominantly speak English at home, her exposure to Chinese and Malay is limited. We are trying to expose Chloe to both languages by speaking to her, but it has not been an easy journey.

What is the first thing you do each time you go back to Singapore?

Laksa has always been my comfort food. Whenever we go back to Singapore, I will always have a bowl of Laksa at Changi Airport. Even though it may not be the best Laksa, it is good enough for me at that point in time!

As for my wife, she misses Mee Rebus and thus that will be the first meal she will enjoy when we return.

What do you always bring back from Singapore for yourself and for your child?

Chloe always likes Tapioca Chilli Crackers and Chicken Floss. My wife will bring back seasonings like Prima Taste, Indonesian / Malaysian seasonings. If it is during the festive period in Singapore when we go back, e.g. Chinese New Year or Hari Raya Aidilfitri, then we will also bring back kueh bangkit, pineapple tarts, love letters, etc.

Top five places in or around Munich you would recommend to parents travelling with kids and why.

If you are travelling with kids, here are our top 5 picks to visit in Munich:

1. Deutsches Museum: This is the world´s largest Museum of Science and Technology. It also has a dedicated hands-on area for kids, plus interactive exhibits on space, aviation and physics. It also features real planes, submarines and trains for kids to explore. Definitely fun for all ages.

2. Olympiapark and BMW World: where the 1972 Munich Olympics were held. Today, Olympiapark has boat rides, playgrounds and an abundance of green open spaces for kids to run around. Next to Olympiapark is BMW World is the Global Corporate HQ of BMW, which has many interactive displays of BMW vehicles and also futuristic vehicles.

3. Englischer Garten: One of the largest urban parks in the world. It is even bigger than Central Park in New York. Families can enjoy a picnic with plenty of space for kids to run and play, and there are several beer gardens. It is also possible to rent paddle boats here. One of the quirks in Englischer Garten is definitely Eisbach River, where you can watch people surfing on a river, a unique Munich attraction! People are surfing on this part of the river regardless of the season!

4. Hellabrunn Zoo: This is a highly rated zoo. Many animals are kept in large, natural enclosures and are cageless. There is a petting zoo for kids, interactive exhibits and adventure playgrounds. The zoo is located on the banks of the Isar River, so you can enjoy a scenic walk along the Isar River after the Zoo.

5. Oktoberfest. How not to miss Oktoberfest in Munich? Families with kids can also enjoy the world-famous Oktoberfest if they are visiting in late September. There are family-friendly beer tents offering traditional food like pretzels and apple strudel. There are rides (carousels, Ferris Wheel and mini roller coaster), traditional puppet shows for younger kids, Funfair games and Food Stalls.

What is the local cuisine like and do you eat out a lot or cook at home?

Typical local cuisine consists of Weißwurst (or white sausage) served with Mustard and pretzel; Pork Knuckle served with Potato dumplings and sauerkraut and Kartoffelsalat (Potato
Salad). We generally eat at home as my wife loves to cook (as mentioned above). On important occasions like birthdays, anniversaries or weekends then we eat out.

What’s the one thing you would miss about Germany if you moved away?

We would definitely miss the Christmas markets. German Christmas markets are world-renowned. The Munich Christmas Market is one of the oldest and most famous, dating back to the 14th Century. The atmosphere, especially when it is snowing–the scent and aroma Glühwein (mulled wine), Bratwurst, etc, are something words cannot describe. Some of the Christmas ornaments are so unique that you cannot find them elsewhere.

How do you stay connected with the Singaporean community?

Since we first started living abroad, we have always made an effort to connect with the Singapore Community, either through the Singapore Embassy activities or social media groups. At the same time, we also try to help new Singaporeans moving in by offering advice and recommendations on practicalities to hopefully reduce the stress of moving to a new country.

In Sweden, I was the founding head of my alma mater’s Alumni (Nanyang Technological University, NTU Singapore). I organise gatherings for fellow alumni in Sweden to connect, network and also stay connected with the University in Singapore. For my efforts, NTU Singapore has awarded me the NTU Alumni Service Award 2024.

In Oct 2024, the Swedish King made a state visit to Singapore, I also shared my reflections in the Straits Times Singapore commemorating the visit.

What do you dread and look forward to most if you were to move back to Singapore?

I cannot imagine moving back to Singapore now. The continuous stressful rat-race culture and the hot, humid weather are something which I do not think I will be able to adapt to, especially being away from Singapore for more than 20 years now.

However, the abundance of fantastic local Singapore food is something we do look forward to. Even at 2am, it is still possible to find great food–and all the 24/7 convenience stores like 7-11, Cheers, etc, what a treat!

How do you think Singaporeans can benefit from living overseas?

We feel that it is extremely beneficial for Singaporeans to live overseas if there is an opportunity to do so. The world is so much bigger than our little red dot. Exposure to different global cultures and perspectives may lead to better appreciation and tolerance. We will be so blinded if we are only living in our Singapore bubble, oblivious to the speed of development that the world is going at.

At the same time, this can also lead to appreciating Singapore’s strengths even more (e.g. safety, public infrastructure, public transport system, strong governance, etc), which many Singaporeans take for granted.

Read more Overseas Family Stories here.